Woman calls for guard rails for social media site “Are we dating the same guy Winnipeg?”

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Posting to social media sites, such as the Facebook group “Are we dating the same guy Winnipeg?” could land you in hot water, even in court, said a local lawyer.

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Even though the group’s intention is to protect people from dysfunctional relationships, the page is being used to make sordid allegations, said concerned resident Stephanie Nyamori in a letter to the Winnipeg Sun that included a screen capture of a group post accusing a man of pedophilia.

“These unverified claims can have serious and potentially harmful consequences for all involved,” she wrote. “Women may be exposed to further risks of violence or abuse, and men may be subjected to damaging false accusations.”

The situation not only threatens the well-being of individuals, but also undermines community integrity, wrote Nyamori, who wants group administrators to do a better job of overseeing posts.

“This includes verifying claims before posting and taking steps to protect the privacy and rights of individuals mentioned in the group,” she said.

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Can a Facebook group called “Are we dating the same guy Winnipeg?” ever be responsible, private and mindful of rights?

A Winnipeg lawyer urges caution.

“If something is true and can be proven, then it’s not defamatory,” said Victor Olson. “The truth is a defence, but at the same time, depending on the way things are presented, there may be innuendoes and insinuations that are not true, that are damaging to someone’s reputation, and so may lead to a serious claim for defamation. There could be financial consequences.”

According to Canadian psychologist Jordan Peterson, female bullying can be “unbelievably vicious” and usually takes the shape of reputation destruction, innuendo and gossip.

“It’s a well-documented field,” he said in a broadcast. “In men, it tends to take the form of outright physical aggression. There’s a whole literature on that. It’s not surprising to anyone. Women have to express aggression somehow, unless you’re willing to say they are not aggressive.”

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Self-expression is important in the context of free speech, but there should be boundaries, said Kelly Gorkoff, associate professor of criminal justice at the University of Winnipeg who has studied violence against women.

“It’s an interesting area of case law that tries to limit what constitutes free speech, and when does that free speech become harmful speech, harming a group, harming an individual?” she said.

“And I think all of us need to be cognizant of when that happens, and be vigilant. We want to be able to make sure people can express things and minimize harm for other people. But at the same time, of course, it has to be monitored.”

Nyamori is calling on government to promote education initiatives regarding the responsible use of social media and the potential consequences of spreading lies.

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“Establish support systems for both victims of abuse and individuals falsely accused, ensuring they have access to legal and psychological assistance,” she said. “The goal is to foster a safer and more respectful environment for everyone, where accusations are made responsibly, and all individuals are treated with dignity and fairness.”

“Are we dating the same guy Winnipeg?” in its rules from group administrators urges healthy debate, kindness and trust.

“Authentic, expressive discussions make groups great, but may also be sensitive and private,” they write. “ What’s shared in the group should stay in the group. Bullying of any kind isn’t allowed, and degrading comments about things like race, religion, culture, sexual orientation, gender or identity will not be tolerated.”

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